The Absolute Worst Number 1 Hits Of The 1980s

[benson111]

People who came of age in the 1980s tend to grumble a lot about the current state of popular music. And while I tend to agree that the top 40 charts today are dreadful, let's face it, they weren't much better in the 80s.

The bottom line is every decade has produced masterful works of songcraft that will stand the test of time, but each decade has also produced a myriad of schlock.

Unfortunately, the best-produced and marketed schlock tends to rise above the good stuff.

For this playlist I looked at all the songs that hit the number one spot on the Billboard Hot 100 chart in the 1980s. Then I picked a single song from each year of the decade. I made my decision on each song by selecting only those tracks that produced the most defined gag reflex.

I would highly recommend not eating directly before giving this playlist a spin and ensuring an unobstructed line to the bathroom.

The Absolute Worst Number 1 Hits Of The 1980s

1. Escape (The Pina Colada Song) - Rupert Holmes (1980)

2. The One That You Love - Air Supply (1981)

3. Truly - Lionel Richie (1982)

4. Flashdance...What A Feeling - Irene Cara (1983)

5. Let's Hear It For The Boy - Deniece Williams (1984)

6. We Built This City - Starship (1985)

7. The Next Time I Fall - Peter Cetera (1986)

8. At This Moment - Billy Vera (1987)

9. Every Rose Has Its Thorn - Poison (1988)

10. Milli Vanilli - Girl I'm Gonna Miss You (1989)

[elfreako]

Should be stickied to be used everytime some idiot scream "Everyone want #1 hits HMX WFT??!?"

[afterstasis]

i like "we built this city" and "every rose".

[Sargehalo51]

That's a great list!

Considering I graduated high school in 1989, I'm sitting here shaking my head at the fact that I liked most of those songs at the time. Damn...

[AxlVanHagar]

i like "we built this city" and "every rose".


Ditto, I actually don't mind the Flashdance theme either.

[Oscar-Rio]

Billy Squire - Rock Me Tonight

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZvl2aqIyNg&feature=related

dear lord.

[Lord_Mhoram]

I actually own all these.

:)

[back_blows]

I can't listen to ERHIT without cringing.

[afterstasis]

I can't listen to ERHIT without cringing.

Was it something I said or something I did
Did my words not come out right
I tried not to hurt you

[back_blows]

Was it something I said or something I did
Did my words not come out right
I tried not to hurt you

Let's get freaky now, let's get ****ing freaky now x 4

[cherokeesam]

Gotta echo Every Rose being nausea-worthy because my college roomie used to play this song EVERY FRICKIN' NIGHT, at least half a dozen times. I've been scarred for life, and absolutely despise the song (even though I'm okay with pretty much the rest of Poison's discography).

And I agree with the list, except for one guilty pleasure: Escape. Still love this song, and it's still one of my karaoke classics.

[Soror_YZBL]

Flashdance is a ****ing AWESOME song!

[AxlVanHagar]

Billy Squire - Rock Me Tonight

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZvl2aqIyNg&feature=related

dear lord.

The song itself is great, it's the vid. Everyone loved the song until they saw the video. Has there ever been a faster downfall for an artist due to a video than this?

[Lolicat]

The song itself is great, it's the vid. Everyone loved the song until they saw the video. Has there ever been a faster downfall for an artist due to a video than this?

In B4 the Buggles.

[cherokeesam]

In B4 the Buggles.

I dunno...did the Buggles actually exist before that video?

[Lolicat]

I dunno...did the Buggles actually exist before that video?

Does it matter? Their song describes his downfall rather well...

[gsmorgan]

Just found the list for Billboard's #1 Songs through the entire decade. The one's that catch my eye...

Physical - Olivia Newton John
Ebony & Ivory - Paul McCartney and Stevie Wonder (nothing wrong with the intent of the song - it just sucked)
Tell Her About It - Billy Joel
All Night Long (All Night) - Lionel Ritchie
Karma Chameleon - Culture Club
Hello - Lionel Ritchie (okay - I won't like anything by him - I just won't)
Like a Virgin - Madonna (although I love "Like a Surgeon")
Say You, Say Me - Lionel Ritchie (see, told ya so)
Sara - Starship
Bad - Michael Jackson
I Think We're Alone Now - Tiffany
Never Gonna Give You Up - Rick Astley
Wishing Well - Terence Trent D'Arby
Together Forever - Rick Astley
Wind Beneath My Wings - Bette Midler
Right Here Waiting - Richard Marx


I could easily add a dozen more - but I had to draw a line somewhere

The list can be found here....

http://www.popculturemadness.com/Music/Number-One-Songs-80s.html

[Lolicat]

Madonna was fairly good back then. Sure, her music wasn't anything special, but it was catchy and fun. Jackson's stuff was generally rather good too.

[gsmorgan]

Madonna was fairly good back then. Sure, her music wasn't anything special, but it was catchy and fun. Jackson's stuff was generally rather good too.

There were a number of Madonna songs that did hit #1 that I didn't include because they were reasonably good for the time and genre - same with Jackson - I just REALLY disliked Bad and Like a Virgin.

[Lolicat]

There were a number of Madonna songs that did hit #1 that I didn't include because they were reasonably good for the time and genre - same with Jackson - I just REALLY disliked Bad and Like a Virgin.

Bad is fairly reprehensible, to be fair. Like a Virgin is hilarious though.

[wolfbane]

NNNNNOOOOOOOOO i read that list and as soon as i came upon that peter cetera selection i flashbacked to peter cetera's "glory of love"
from karate kid 2
glory of love+ralph macchio = ..i don't feel so good..

[cherokeesam]

Yeah, pretty much anything wth Peter Cetera's pawprints all over it ranks in the pukeworthy section....

[afterstasis]

Karma Chameleon - Culture Club
Like a Virgin - Madonna (although I love "Like a Surgeon")
Sara - Starship
Bad - Michael Jackson
I Think We're Alone Now - Tiffany
Wishing Well - Terence Trent D'Arby
Wind Beneath My Wings - Bette Midler


i really dig those songs.

[gsmorgan]

i really dig those songs.
Yeah, this is completely a personal taste thing. Some will absolutely hate some of the #1 songs of the 80's - while others still love them or admit that (at least) to liking them as a guilty pleasure.

For example, Whitesnake's Here I Go Again is on the list, and a pretty good example of fairly tacky hair metal music. I'll admit to still kinda liking that one.

Or, perhaps even worse - I actually still like (and have an .mp3 of) Bobby McFerrin's Don't Worry, Be Happy.

[afterstasis]

Yeah, this is completely a personal taste thing. Some will absolutely hate some of the #1 songs of the 80's - while others still love them or admit that (at least) to liking them as a guilty pleasure.

For example, Whitesnake's Here I Go Again is on the list, and a pretty good example of fairly tacky hair metal music. I'll admit to still kinda liking that one.

Or, perhaps even worse - I actually still like (and have an .mp3 of) Bobby McFerrin's Don't Worry, Be Happy.

totally. i love both of those as well. "tacky" and "in bad taste" are right up my alley.

[Soror_YZBL]

All Night Long (All Night) - Lionel Ritchie
Karma Chameleon - Culture Club
Like a Virgin - Madonna
I Think We're Alone Now - Tiffany
Never Gonna Give You Up - Rick Astley
Wishing Well - Terence Trent D'Arby
Wind Beneath My Wings - Bette Midler


These songs are all awesome, except the bette song. Bette's followup, from a distance, was an amazing Nanci Griffith song before Bette did it and messed it up for the rest of us. I have no idea how I can love Liza Minelli and Barbra Streisand, yet I don't like Bette Midler. Maybe I needed to be a bigger *** hag in my youth?

I will say that Beaches is a great movie though. It's no fried green tomatoes, but it does the trick.

[AxlVanHagar]

For example, Whitesnake's Here I Go Again is on the list, and a pretty good example of fairly tacky hair metal music. I'll admit to still kinda liking that one.


Oh how I loathe what they did to that song , the original was so much better.

[Lolicat]

Or, perhaps even worse - I actually still like (and have an .mp3 of) Bobby McFerrin's Don't Worry, Be Happy.

I hate to admit it, but I think I kind of like that song. Or at least, the message makes me smile. It played on the bus one day and me and my friend started dancing to it and singing along because everyone else looked like they had just been told they were HIV positive or something, they were so miserable.

[Ryyke]

"Africa" by Toto is the best #1 hit of the 80s.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lPT_3PEjnsE

This is fact not opinion.

[Lolicat]

No

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=stNGHiscETo