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BallisticJunkfood
03-07-2009, 11:06 PM
Chuck Norris once walked down the street with a massive erection.

There were no survivors.
Russian313373
03-07-2009, 11:09 PM
when chuck was born, he slapped the doctor
SonicRocker15X
03-07-2009, 11:11 PM
Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin.

... That he built with his bare hands.
mimic
03-08-2009, 04:26 AM
When chuck norris does a push up he's not pushing himself up he's pushing the earth down.
rowtheboat
03-08-2009, 06:42 AM
Chuck Norris read this thread, and said, ''when did I do that?''
athenahollow
03-08-2009, 07:20 AM
And then Chuck remembered that he was so awesome, those things did them for him, instead of him doing them.
HeyRiles
03-08-2009, 10:22 AM
Chuck Norris once walked down the street with a massive erection.

There were no survivors.

I'm pretty sure there is no woman alive that could give Chuck Norris even the slightest of wiggle
Lily_Mu
03-08-2009, 10:24 AM
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Russian313373
03-08-2009, 12:09 PM
the only time chuck was wrong, was when he thought he was wrong
Aragha
03-08-2009, 12:16 PM
Capt. MacMillan owns Chuck Norris.

He is merely a puppet!
firescull537
03-08-2009, 01:44 PM
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad.
BallisticJunkfood
03-08-2009, 01:53 PM
Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow tuesday".
BevoTheWarrior
03-08-2009, 02:30 PM
All 99 of Jay-Z's problems are Chuck Norris.
Starfleet_Rambo
03-08-2009, 03:31 PM
http://pix.motivatedphotos.com/2009/2/5/633694455458311760-chucknorris.jpg
SonicRocker15X
03-08-2009, 03:36 PM
Chuck Norris stole the Metal Pack 01 and Rock Band Japan.
Starfleet_Rambo
03-08-2009, 03:39 PM
HMX can't release the three remaining Nevermind songs because they can't jump high enough to take the masters from Chuck's hand.
BallisticJunkfood
03-08-2009, 03:52 PM
Chuck Norris has FC'd every song on every instrument on expert difficulty.

He can also play every song on expert difficulty on all 4 instruments at the same time.
SonicRocker15X
03-08-2009, 03:54 PM
Chuck Norris's only flaw is that people think he has flaws.
Chuck Norris once made a video game. It was rejected because as soon as Chuck was supposed to appear onscreen, the console melted.
Russian313373
03-08-2009, 07:36 PM
Chuck Norris once made a video game. It was rejected because as soon as Chuck was supposed to appear onscreen, the console melted.

hmm.. really? i read somewhere that your eyes explode.... wierd
NoMoreVillains
03-08-2009, 11:21 PM
Chuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
Hungryfreak
03-09-2009, 12:18 AM
Chuck? Chuck Schildiner? Chuck D.?
billman3000
03-09-2009, 12:48 AM
chuck norris ordered a big mac at burger king and got one
BallisticJunkfood
03-09-2009, 08:07 AM
Chuck? Chuck Schildiner? Chuck D.?

Chuck Norris is now on his way to roundhouse kick you in the face.
tims1491
03-09-2009, 10:50 AM
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.
NoMoreVillains
03-09-2009, 12:55 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.