If WW2 was an RTS...

[IErrantVentureI]

It would have gone something like this.

Feel free to take it off if this is deemed politically incorrect, etc. I think it's very funny. Some of you have probably seen it before.

Warning, language follows.

If World War Two had been an online Real Ttime Strategy game, the chat room traffic would have gone something like this.

*Hitler[AoE] has joined the game.*
*Eisenhower has joined the game.*
*paTTon has joined the game.*
*Churchill has joined the game.*
*benny-tow has joined the game.*
*T0J0 has joined the game.*
*Roosevelt has joined the game.*
*Stalin has joined the game.*
*deGaulle has joined the game.*
Roosevelt: hey sup
T0J0: y0
Stalin: hi
Churchill: hi
Hitler[AoE]: cool, i start with panzer tanks!
paTTon: lol more like panzy tanks
T0JO: lol
Roosevelt: o this fockin sucks i got a depression!
benny-tow: haha america sux
Stalin: hey hitler you dont fight me i dont fight u, cool?
Hitler[AoE]; sure whatever
Stalin: cool
deGaulle: **** Hitler rushed some1 help
Hitler[AoE]: lol byebye frenchy
Roosevelt: i dont got **** to help, sry
Churchill: wtf the luftwaffle is attacking me
Roosevelt: get antiair guns
Churchill: i cant afford them
benny-tow: u n00bs know what team talk is?
paTTon: stfu
Roosevelt: o yah hit the navajo button guys
deGaulle: eisenhower ur worthless come help me quick
Eisenhower: i cant do **** til rosevelt gives me an army
paTTon: yah hurry the fock up
Churchill: d00d im gettin pounded
deGaulle: this is fockin weak u guys suck
*deGaulle has left the game.*
Roosevelt: im gonna attack the axis k?
benny-tow: with what? ur wheelchair?
benny-tow: lol did u mess up ur legs AND ur head?
Hitler[AoE]: ROFLMAO
T0J0: lol o no america im comin 4 u
Roosevelt: wtf! thats bullsh1t u **** im gunna kick ur asses
T0JO: not without ur harbors u wont! lol
Roosevelt: u little biotch ill get u
Hitler[AoE]: wtf
Hitler[AoE]: america hax, u had depression and now u got a huge fockin army
Hitler[AoE]: thats bullsh1t u hacker
Churchill: lol no more france for u hitler
Hitler[AoE]: tojo help me!
T0J0: wtf u want me to do, im on the other side of the world ******
Hitler[AoE]: fine ill clear you a path
Stalin: WTF u arsshoel! WE HAD A FoCKIN TRUCE
Hitler[AoE]: i changed my mind lol
benny-tow: haha
benny-tow: hey ur losing ur guys in africa im gonna need help in italy soon sum1
T0J0: o **** i cant help u i got my hands full
Hitler[AoE]: im 2 busy 2 help
Roosevelt: yah thats right ***** im comin for ya
Stalin: church help me
Churchill: like u helped me before? sure ill just sit here
Stalin: dont be an arss
Churchill: dont be a commie. oops too late
Eisenhower: LOL
benny-tow: hahahh oh sh1t help
Hitler: o man ur focked
paTTon: oh what now biotch
Roosevelt: whos the cripple now lol
*benny-tow has been eliminated.*
benny-tow: lame
Roosevelt: gj patton
paTTon: thnx
Hitler[AoE]: WTF eisenhower hax hes killing all my sh1t
Hitler[AoE]: quit u hacker so u dont ruin my record
Eisenhower: Nuts!
benny~tow: wtf that mean?
Eisenhower: meant to say nutsack lol finger slipped
paTTon: coming to get u hitler u paper hanging hun cocksocker
Stalin: rofl
T0J0: HAHAHHAA
Hitler[AoE]: u guys are fockin ***
Hitler[AoE]: ur never getting in my city
*Hitler[AoE] has been eliminated.*
benny~tow: OMG u noob you killed yourself
Eisenhower: ROFLOLOLOL
Stalin: OMG LMAO!
Hitler[AoE]: WTF i didnt click there omg this game blows
*Hitler[AoE] has left the game*
paTTon: hahahhah
T0J0: WTF my teammates are n00bs
benny~tow: shut up noob
Roosevelt: haha wut a moron
paTTon: wtf am i gunna do now?
Eisenhower: yah me too
T0J0: why dont u attack me o thats right u dont got no ships lololol
Eisenhower: fock u
paTTon: lemme go thru ur base commie
Stalin: go to hell lol
paTTon: fock this sh1t im goin afk
Eisenhower: yah this is ***
*Roosevelt has left the game.*
Hitler[AoE]: wtf?
Eisenhower: sh1t now we need some1 to join
*tru_m4n has joined the game.*
tru_m4n: hi all
T0J0: hey
Stalin: sup
Churchill: hi
tru_m4n: OMG OMG OMG i got all his stuff!
tru_m4n: NUKES! HOLY **** I GOT NUKES
Stalin: d00d gimmie some plz
tru_m4n: no way i only got like a couple
Stalin: omg dont be *** gimmie nuculer secrets
T0J0: wtf is nukes?
T0J0: holy ****holy****hoyl****!
*T0J0 has been eliminated.*
*The Allied team has won the game!*
Eisenhower: awesome!
Churchill: gg noobs no re
T0J0: thats bull**** u fockin suck
*T0J0 has left the game.*
*Eisenhower has left the game.*
Stalin: next game im not going to be on ur team, u guys didnt help me for ****
Churchill: wutever, we didnt need ur help neway dumbarss
tru_m4n: l8r all
benny~tow: bye
Churchill: l8r
Stalin: fock u all
tru_m4n: shut up commie lol
*tru_m4n has left the game.*
benny~tow: lololol u commie
Churchill: ROFL
Churchill: bye commie
*Churchill has left the game.*
*benny~tow has left the game.*
Stalin: i hate u all ****
*Stalin has left the game.*
paTTon: lol no1 is left
paTTon: weeeee i got a jeep
*paTTon has been eliminated.*
paTTon: o sh1t!
*paTTon has left the game.*

[oboewan]

Niiiice.

*censors fake swearwords, prints out, shows to history teacher*

[hawkofva]

I'm going to have to post just to balance the number of Star Wars inspired names in this thread.

That is pretty funny, but somewhat headache inducing to read.

[oboewan]

I'm going to have to post just to balance the number of Star Wars inspired names in this thread.

That is pretty funny, but somewhat headache inducing to read.Hey, at least OP went for something moderately obscure instead of taking an obvious pun like I did.

[hawkofva]

Hey, at least OP went for something moderately obscure instead of taking an obvious pun like I did.
True, true. Baanu has him beaten there though.

[Goatbuster]

That's great! I can has nuculer sekretz?

[athenahollow]

http://content.ytmnd.com/content/4/c/4/4c42c76bd57e6f441b03e9f4395f11e8.gif

same thing, but in picture format... and w/ swears.

[clashcityrocker10]

That's pretty funny. This reminds me of this: http://fc64.deviantart.com/fs22/f/2008/002/0/1/World_War_Two__Simple_Version_by_AngusMcLeod.jpg
You'll probably have to enlarge the image when you open the page.

[bierfaht]

holy historical inaccuracy! the depression that hit the USA was WORLDWIDE and it hit Germany even harder due to the enormous debt owed to Britain and France from Versailles. That being said, by the time Germany invaded Poland 9.1.39, Germany's economy had righted itself due to massive industrialization efforts, while the USA was still hovering around 9 percent unemployment 6 years into the New Deal.

Fun fact: in 1940, the USA's military ranked 17th in the world behind such military giants as Holland and Portugal. IF this was an RTS, USA would have tremendous bonuses to production and resource gathering, as no one could outproduce us!

/history teacher

[dady5000]

http://content.ytmnd.com/content/4/c/4/4c42c76bd57e6f441b03e9f4395f11e8.gif

same thing, but in picture format... and w/ swears.

What's the link to the original YTMND?

[Goatbuster]

That's pretty funny. This reminds me of this: http://fc64.deviantart.com/fs22/f/2008/002/0/1/World_War_Two__Simple_Version_by_AngusMcLeod.jpg
You'll probably have to enlarge the image when you open the page.

My god...this is awesome. Saved.

[Avatar_Ko]

I'm going to have to post just to balance the number of Star Wars inspired names in this thread.

That is pretty funny, but somewhat headache inducing to read.

I wish I could mod you up for knowing what the Errant Venture is.

[athenahollow]

What's the link to the original YTMND?

http://wwtworts.ytmnd.com/

Only reason I linked just the pic is because I had scripts turned off in case it was a super annoying song in the bkg, but just checked and it's all good :)

[Baanu_Rass]

True, true. Baanu has him beaten there though.

Yes I do :D

I hope you've all seen the WWI (http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/World_War_I_(video_game)) version.