Empire Decries Rebel Yell

[Lawdog1521]

Tatooine - AP

Today the galactic Empire issued a statement voicing it’s displeasure with Harmonix’s decision to release the Billy Idol song Rebel Yell. The song, a long standing staple of the 80’s, recently became DLC for the companies much lauded Rockband franchise.

“I think it shows distinct favoritism.” says Governor Grand Moff Tarkin, head of the Empires Outland regions. “These rebels are nothing more than shouting terrorist. This song does nothing but encourage this behavior.”

Since the release of the song there’s been a sharp increase in rebel activity, including the destruction of two of the Empires planetary relief aid stations know as “Life Stars”. (Maliciously called “Death Stars” by the far left rebels)

Several attempts have been made to contact singer Idol for his feeling on the subject. Unfortunately Imperial representative Lord Vader says Idol is unavailable due to an accidental choking incident earlier this week.

[bood-boy]

awful. i regret even opening this thread. oww my eyes and brain.

[Cpt. Overkill]

...I don't say this much but...

FAIL.

[ryan12147]

lol.

[tridentgum0]

"is unavailable due to an accidental choking incident earlier this week."

Um...what?

[Renrock]

Man, and I thought the riots that followed Rebel Girl's Rock Band release were bad.

[Lawdog1521]

"is unavailable due to an accidental choking incident earlier this week."

Um...what?

Think about it...


Edit: More specifically who said it.

[Tank9088]

Mildly amusing.

[sa_nick]

Mildly amusing.

Agreed.

This kinda thread kicks ass over "i love heyriles, lol". Even/Especially if you do actually love heyriles.

[Lawdog1521]

Mildly amusing.

I try to refrain from unnecessarily over stimulating people.:)

[tridentgum0]

Think about it...


Edit: More specifically who said it.

Ooooohhhhh. :p

[bermuddy]

A+ for effort, C for execution. overall grade B.
nice job OP

[Daemius]

I grinned. Then again, I'm a big nerd and am easily amused by nerd humor.

[ffwarrior47]

I smiled. :)

[RockBandRocker]

Agreed.

This kinda thread kicks ass over "i love heyriles, lol". Even/Especially if you do actually love heyriles.

This.

My thread was trying to share the Riles love, but alas, it got closed.

[ArmsAreLoud]

More clever then most of what gets posted here, not nearly clever enough to make me laugh.

[Baanu_Rass]

Coruscant - IP

Today the Galactic Empire issued a statement voicing it’s displeasure with Harmonix’s decision to release the Billy Idol song Rebel Yell. The song, a long standing staple of the 80’s, recently became DLC for the companies much lauded Rockband franchise.

“I think it shows distinct favoritism.” says Grand Moff Tarkin of Oversector Outer. “These rebels are nothing more than shouting terrorists. This song does nothing but encourage this behavior.”

Since the release of the song there’s been a sharp increase in rebel activity, including an attack on Imperial forces above Toprawa.

Several attempts have been made to contact the singer's manager, Conan Motti, for his feelings on the subject. Unfortunately Imperial representative Lord Vader says Motti is unavailable due to an accidental choking incident earlier this week.

Fixed.

[Lawdog1521]

Fixed.

Thanks. My geek level is only at 14 and I need 345 EXP before I level up. I’ll put my new points into Intelligence when I do though, so I’ll get the minor details right next time. :)

[Lawdog1521]

More clever then most of what gets posted here, not nearly clever enough to make me laugh.

Would "Wookie" references help?

[Runesmith]

Fixed.

Our sensors are detecting a large quantity of win in this sector, captain.

[Baanu_Rass]

Just to do another here


Peace Brigade Elements Wage Propoganda War

Yuuzhan'tar - Galactic Alliance Press

Nom Anor has once again released a message to the fledgling Galactic Alliance. In it he praises the acts of Peace Brigade members Judas Priest and Harmonix. The two have recently collaborated on project to release anti-Alliance propaganda through the most despicable channels: Electronic games.

In it he praises them for "helping one of the most backwards planets in this galaxy" and "showing them the importance of sacrifice". Just this week Judas Priest's brand new single, Pain and Pleasure, was released onto the Rock Band platform. The rest of the new album was also released.

In response Chief of State Cal Omas declared the release a "commercialization of a war that threatens our very existence." He later added "If we lose this war then any money they make will be worthless. The Yuuzhan Vong will treat them worse than Shamed Ones."

Neither Judas Priest or Harmonix could be reached for comment but part of the announcement on the Rock Band Forums declared it to be "Awesome".

I had considered adding the following part but realized my fanboy was showing a little too much. (NJO Spoilers)


Jaina Solo, daughter of the famous Han and Leia Solo reacted far worse. "Rrrrarggg I'm darc sied nao!" Her brother added "Man, there's like, no dark side. It's inside you and all around you but you can't touch it." The only sane Solo kid, Anakin, became too awesome for existence earlier this year and disappeared into the force and is unreachable for comment.

[Lawdog1521]

Just to do another here



I had considered adding the following part but realized my fanboy was showing a little too much. (NJO Spoilers)

Mine wasn’t as detailed because I found it originally in the Intergalactic Enquirer, buried between an article on who was seen partying with Queen Amidala at the Naboo 51 club and an article on Jabba the Hutt’s amazing new weight loss program.

[Mystlyfe77]

I was fairly amused. A poor man's "Onion" mini-article. It's a start, could use a little more humor and reworking of jokes, but it was a solid concept.
*thumbs up*

[WingsOfSteel]

When asked for comment on the Billy Idol song, Senator Leia Organa (I - Alderaan) cried, "More, more, more."

[xXjAmEZXx]

fail

[R33DH4M]

i think i threw up a little bit in my mouth

[folkeye]

Ouch.