and I didn't say that less respect should be paid to him, I said that, considering his situation, not to be surprised that others don't "respect" his ideals, which he himself stuck loosely to.
and, anyway, it really is as simple as not using his avatar if you want to "respect" him by doing so. others out there who loved him just as much won't mind it, even probably enjoy it. they should be deprived of the means to celebrate him in a manner they are ok with? like you said, he's not around to say different.