Witticus's Storybook of Awesome

[Witticus]

Roxandi sat gazing at the sea running her hand through it as swirls of colors transcended through it with her touch, the water soon swirled to a stop and Daginfor's reflection appeared from behind her own as she jumped. Daginfor apologized for startling her as she rolled her eyes and gazed back at the water. Daginfor held up the glass put some sea water in a cup pointed to it and played some notes on his guitar as it transformed a different color. Daginfor smiled took a drink and gaged, "ack, that's clam juice now!!" Roxandi laughed which was the first smile he'd seen on her since... That grim day.

"OK, so maybe I haven't perfected my purification technique yet, can I buy you a real drink instead?" Daginfor said as Roxandi glared at him and dove under the water vanishing. He looked to see what Roxandi was drawing on the water, seeing colored portraits of Bulzentio and Micagio floating in the waves. His face turned red as he quickly walked away.

[Witticus]

"OK Mr. President, we've finished that solid gold statue of you, how did this fix the national deficit?" the assistant asked.

"Word." President LeGod said as he stood motionlessly gazing at his giant golden form.

"That doesn't help us in any sort of way, does it." The assistant noted putting his hand to his face and trying not let LeGod see him cry.

"The mission is to complete the mission." LeGod said as he rubbed his giant golden leg.

"Sure..." The assistant said as he looked in his pockets for any sort of pill to make him forget his wasted time.

"We must capture the girl." LeGod said as the assistant turned to him.

"This sounds like an actual plan," the assistant said as he took out his notebook. "Who, and why do we capture them?"

[jibjqrkl]

[Witticus]

Daginfor walked home with his guitar feeling like a jerk as he saw Roxandi on the street nearby as he dove into an alleyway so she didn't have to preteend not to notice him. That's when a massive helicopter came out of the sky. Roxandi held up her arm to fight back the heavy wind as a couple of masked figures jumped out of the copter, grabbing her. Daginfor played a paralysis riff of stopiness that nailed a nearby masked figure, but missed several others who all had crossbows aimed at him. Daginfor played as fast as he soon heard the click of several dozen bolts fired at him.

[Witticus]

Daginfor woke up on the street surrounded by people as he looked around trying to understand how he was still alive. He saw the bolts sitting on the street next to him except for one in his leg. He winced as he pulled out the bolt and saw his flesh rapidly heal where the bolt had been. He then remembered his day of drinking various concoctions and realized he must have accidentally made a rapid healing syrum. He picked up the bolt and knew just who to see about this.

[jibjqrkl]

DI is such a drinker...

[Witticus]

Daginfor arrived in Make Some Noise City as he came to a large laboratory scattered with an eccentric and obsessive amount of modified machines.

"Hey Doc!" Daginfor screamed as it echoed causing some of the machines to light up. After an uncomfortable several minutes of silence except for beeps and whistles of machines a familiar face arose from back.

"Daginfor, how's my favorite nephew doing today, would you like some juice?" Doc asked as he walked closer.

"No thank you," Daginfor said as his face turned slightly sick thinking of the various nasty juices he consumed that day. "I did almost die today, and I think you may be able to help figure out who tried to kill me." He proceeded to lay the bolts on the table as Doc's eyes lit up.

[dragoninforcer]

This is heavy, Doc.

[jibjqrkl]

that sounds quite unhealthy, your eyes lighting up like that

[Witticus]

"Well it's definitely something I created, I can tell this because my logo is on here.
Whether it be used for war or bone a whore,
It always has my signature." Doc's voice echoed through his mind as he climbed further up a mountain.

"You're not going to like this, but this came from a group located within KMFDM hills." Doc's voice echoed as he nearly lost his footing on a snowy path barely able to see an inch in front of him.

"But KMFDM is just a village?" Daginfor responded.

"Not if you know where to look" Doc said as Daginfor crawled to the top of the mountain seeing a large facility below.

"Son of a gun was right..." Daginfor said as he approached the lights of the facility.