HMXQualityControl said...
HMXQualityControl said...
A bad bug (or bugs) can ruin even
the best game. Just today I was playing a next-gen game with a red haired female
fighter, and found a game-stopping bug within the first ten minutes. I bring
this up because a few weeks ago we asked you to give us the worst bug you ever
found in a game. You responded, and we thought we'd post those responses in
order from bad to worst. (The bug, not your responses. They were
awesome.)
The
Blah:
Sometimes a bug allows you to
exploit a game and in the case of multiplayer, this can be a joy or a nightmare.
Apples used a Day of Defeat spawn bug to allow him to kill newly spawned enemies
at the start of a round. He didn't tell anyone about the bug which helped it not
spread (good for him), but he obviously used the bug for his own gain (boo).
Podruvan had fun with his friends exploiting a bug that allowed them to freeze
in mid-air in Tony Hawk Project 8 whenever they tried to do a bail.
Unfortunately for them, they weren't able to get the bug the next time they
played the game.
On the flip side, Sillypop couldn't
stand the amount of people that used Halo 2's "super jump". This bug allowed you
to target a flying vehicle with a sword, and the lunge move would send you
flying through the air, and across the map at a great speed.
The
Bad:
Dabog666 was playing Oblivion when
at one point he fell through the floor, landed on the roof and then the cycle
continued that way over and over again. No direction home was also playing Tony
Hawk Project 8 and got stuck to the inside of a quarter pipe. He never played
the game again. It's currently crying itself to sleep in his DVD shelf, hoping
someday No direction home will forgive it.
The
Ugly:
borgasm didn't actually experience
this bug, but heard about a disease in WOW that jerks could spread by letting
loose their infected pet in the middle of a crowded town. gh2masterwellalmost
stated that ET in general was the worst bug (you can't really call it a game) he
ever experienced. JB4GDI was playing Twilight Princess and bypassed some mission
objectives, and went straight to kill a boss. All seemed cool until he realized
that doing so made it so he couldn't continue any further. Lastly, is a bug that
I think is close to a lot of our hearts. Apples was playing Dead Rising on
Infinity Mode (which is harder than a body builder), and after investing 9
straight hours his Xbox 360 locked up meaning he lost 9 hours of his life (since
you can't save in Infinity Mode).
That's it for this week! Thanks for
all the great comments the last few weeks. This week we'd like to hear about
what game (other than Rock Band) you're most looking forward to this fall! We
say "other than Rock Band" only because we know it's at the top of your
wishlist. Right?
HMXQualityControl said...
This week we're going over the bugs
that were submitted from our picture 3 weeks ago. We have Blaze the QA cop to go
over what went right and what went terribly wrong. He'll be laying down the law
and making sure you follow it in the future.
Law 1: Give Expectations
Whenever you write up a bug, it
isn't enough to just list what's wrong. You also have to let people know what
you expect to be happening instead. This allows the person who is assigned the
bug to easily understand why you think this is a bug, and how it could be
changed to meet player expectations. For example; when I turn on a family
sitcom, I expect it to suck. If it's good, it may make me question all that I've
previously believed to be true.
Law 2: No dupes!
Many of those that responded
duplicated a bug that was already listed by another individual. Duplicate bugs
are definitely frowned upon in the QA department. They slow down the departments
that need to fix the bugs since they are reading over the same problem more than
once. You'll get no praise for finding a bug if it's a bug that's already been
logged (you will probably get mocked by fellow QA co-workers
though).
Law 3: No Missed Bugs
It's not necessary for one QA member
to find all the bugs, but missed bugs hurt the final product. If a bug is
overlooked, than it can end up in the game and in players' hands without it being
fixed. While most of the bugs were found, some like the short girl with black
hair having stick figure legs and the baby missing fingers on one hand were
missed. These wouldn't be considered game killing bugs, but they still could be
embarrassing if left in the final version. Some may have missed these bugs
because they thought it was a stylistic choice on the part of the creator. While
this could potentially be true, you can never make an assumption like this since
you have no way of knowing for sure. When in doubt, bug it. The last thing you
want is to have an alien that vomits milk in your next sci-fi shooter, because
no one bothered to ask if he was supposed to be drinking it instead.
Much like a relationship between a
grizzly bear and a poodle, we've displayed some tough love up above. But the
reality is that for a bunch of unpaid video game blog readers, you all did an
amazing job. So much so, that we'd like to call out a few of the more notable
responders.
Stinkdog2007 did a great job of
posting early and putting in a ton of bugs. The earlier a problem is found, the
earlier it gets fixed.
ababypenguin refused to dupe any
other posters, but also didn't let us know of any bugs. Well at least he got
half of the equation right.
newwaytoadie was one of the first to
point out that the background artist didn't do his job. Not many gamers would
want to move around a world with no clear
environment.
Xyliac and no_direction_home both
found 30 bugs (if we believe them) and so they get kudos for being observant
testers.
With that out of the way, this week
we'd like you to write in the worst bug you ever found in a game and if it
ruined the title for you. Next week we'll use the worst bugs in our blog
post.
HMXQualityControl said...
Thanks to
everyone who responded to our QA test last week. We're going to take it to step
two next week, where we show you what we do with that list of found bugs, and
present our second test of QA mastery. This week, we're too busy,finding bugs.
In a certain game. So in place of a blog, here are 19 interesting things about
some members of QA:
- When Grace (as seen at E3!)
isn't whaling on everyone with her awesome Expert Guitar Skillz, she also
astounds us with her phenomenal Metal Casting Skillz making video game
jewelry. - Crash Queen Whitney beats
things up in her spare time. Seriously. - Razlo has published a book.
- Despite meeting him face-to
face, Maria didn't realize she was standing in front of Brad Pitt. ("Meh,"
was her subsequent response to her flipping-out friends.) - Alex's car has gold wheels and
big red mudflaps. - Bill holds the world record for
the highest score on Kid Icarus. (1,044,000. On one life, even!) - Only 1,800 people every 12
years share the same combination of western and eastern astrological signs
as Luke. Yet out of these 1,800, it's only Luke who works here. This makes
him the Chosen One. - Justin P mooned his teacher in
first grade. - Danny is sixteen.
- Keith (as seen at E3!) has an
astounding collection of Chinese kung-fu movies and vintage muscle car Hot
Wheels. - Justin S is permanently missing
a fingernail, which on appearance, is not as gross as it sounds. He's also
distantly related to Steven Tyler. - Daniel K was on the 1995
National Fencing Team. - Adam has cool mustaches.
- EJ was a Speedo model.
- Mike can put his foot behind
his head. - Aaron E. can make sounds with
his ears. (It's really cool!) - Nate won an air guitar contest
while working as a waiter in NY. - Matt once appeared on CNN to
debate the importance of Thomas Jefferson. - Tim D likes bunnies.
That's it
folks! See you soon with the next big challenge from the QA Cave!
HMXQualityControl said...
We've
all seen the "Draw Blinky!" or "Sketch Donkers!" art tests for correspondence
art schools-you know, the ones where if you trace the hamster in the baseball
cap (and are willing to fork over a few hundred buckeroos) you get a
certificate that says you can make art and stuff. (I mean, anyone can make art,
but this means you're LICENSED. So you can make official art!) And we've
all seen the commercial for QA where they promise their boss they're just
"tightening up the graphics" on one game before completing ANOTHER game that
afternoon. But did you know that to truly be in QA, you have to master those
tasks-and more? Much, much more?
A
career in QA isn't for everyone. You might have beat Devil May Cry 3 on
the 'Dante Must Die!' mode or completed Ninja Gaiden as a Master Ninja,
but it doesn't mean that the doors to the QA pit/cage/cave will be opened, with
the attendant treasures of bottomless bottles of Vitamin Water and all the
fortune cookies you can eat. Oh no, my friends. Not at all.
To
be honest, being a quality Quality Assurance Tester means you must have
some form of minor OCD, wherein you have no problem repeating tasks endlessly,
hoping to produce unusual results. You must have patience-the kind of patience
heretofore known only by Buddhist monks and nineteenth-century tapestry
weavers. To quote Grace, "You must have some sort of mental disorder, or you
won't be able to get along with anyone. I mean, you're going to have to be able
to test builds while arguing about the Hulk for nine hours. And the next
morning, you have to start the same conversation all over-but this time, it's
about the Thing."
To
top it all off, you must have an eye for detail. Minute, absurdist, crazy
detail. If this still sounds appealing, we present to you the initial test of
any QA initiate.
Here's
a picture. Think of it as a morning's build. Feel free to identify and list as
many mistakes as you discover. If you find more than ten, you might have a
future career in QA!
HMXQualityControl said...
Here
at Harmonix, we drink from the Goblet of Rock.
It just so happens that in place of wine or
blood, the Goblet is filled with a special treat indeed. What makes these
little disk-like miracles of pastel goodness so unique? Kurt explains:
"First
of all, I'm told they taste like communion wafers. Which is interesting to me,
because I'm not Catholic. Secondly, they look like UFOs. That's always good.
Thirdly, they're musical and sound like maracas, so they're perfect for our
company, which enjoys a little rhythm with our snacks. They're not so much food
or candy as they are an activity." And what causes the maracas-like
sound?
SPRINKLES!
This candy just gets better and better! But we're not finished yet!
Heather
loves the savory outside:
,but
not the sweet, sweet insides.
So
she can share with a friend-
-someone
like Bailey, who LOVES the inside and throws the savory shells away!
Thus
the Harmonix ideals:
- Space-Age Awesomeness
- Musicality
- (Perhaps most importantly)
Sharing With Friends (W00t!)
Are
all summed up in a perfect (and perfectly weird) piece of candy. Try some
today!
HMXQualityControl said...
It's been an interesting experience moving into a new work space. Somewhere between the challenges and fun, we found a place to call home (during our working hours anyway). Here's a photo journey of the experience.
HMXQualityControl said...
HMXQualityControl said...
What? What are you guys doing HERE? Shouldn't you be on the rest of the internet looking at the results of all our hard work?!? Go. Go NOW!
HMXQualityControl said...
"Hello! My name is Mamsey Fortinbras, and I'm the
curator of the Regal Freqtonia Gallery here at Harmonix Studios.
Today, I'll be showcasing some of our finer acquisitions
here in the East Wing."
"Quite a rare piece-we were lucky to attain it in a
rather ferocious auction. It's an original Wong-circa 2006, or 5 A. F. (After
Frequency). The medium is teal and orange Sharpie on a 100% Hanes cotton
canvas. Remarkable!"
"A more contemplative piece. Like the fabled sirens
from stories of old, this queenly vampire lured the photographer into her
"workspace." This picture was the last he ever took."
"This work captures another bittersweet moment in
the gallery's history. We believed we had acquired a top-shelf fire
extinguisher from a record label's seldom-used crypt. Then the rock zombies
formerly known as Megasus came, and we realized why no one had bothered to
outbid us on eBay."
"We're not sure of the original name of the
gentleman in the red tie. However, he is whispered of in our halls as both
'Dumbledore' and also 'Highest Lord Zork.' What IS known is that this
protective gesture around an unnamed Harmonix employee has been adopted by
visitors to the gallery as a good luck charm. A replica of this image is
available on mousepads in our gift shop."
"This piece captures a moment of hedonistic abandon.
Titled 'Premature Money Hats', it showcases an overzealous employee adorning
himself with bonus lucre that was part of his hiring contract. The captured
expression of shock and incredulity shows the subject's reaction after being
told EXACTLY what "reaching gold master" requires. Challenging,
indeed. Let's move on."
"Amigos Para Siempre," or alternately, "A
Study of Seasons on George's
displayed by these gentlemen is compelling. The use of water to highlight their
expressions of sheer joy...I'm overcome. It's too much. We'll need to stop here
so I can compose myself. Until next time-rock out, ladies and gentlemen. I hope
you enjoyed the tour!"
HMXQualityControl said...
HMXQualityControl said...
HMXQualityControl said...
From Blog of user: Jackson5SoupKing371
Hi Harmonix,
I love all of your games, but I've been
thinking that they all make me so thirsty 'cause they are just that
intense. So then I got to thinking... well if I get so thirsty playing
their games, I wonder how thirsty they must get developing their
games... So then I thought... well why don't I just ask them...And that
led me to ask you guys, Don't you guys get thirsty? What do you drink
all day? I bet you drink a lot of VitaminWater like they do in
Grandma's Boy, right? Well
well thanks,
-Bobo
Well Bobo, thanks for taking an interest in our drinking
habits. To answer your question, we
launched a full investigation of a few of the drinks we have at Harmonix.
Here at Harmonix we are provided with an infinite supply of
beverages, thanks to the beverage fairies.
You can't see it here, but off to the right, the rack just keeps
going. It's like the gun rack in the
Matrix.
Hmmm . Harmonix?
Matrix? Do you see some
similarity there? I do. Would you like the red vitamin water or the
blue vitamin water?
As you can see, we have many bottles with glass and metal,
neither of which
will let us recycle.
It took a lot of brain effort to catalogue and critique the
beverage selection we have.
And we lost a lot of good men doing it.
Here at Harmonix, we like to taste the rainbow.
Most carbonated beverages use Carbon Dioxide, but here at
Harmonix we have special versions of commercial soda created just for us using
Nitrous Rockcide.
Many people here like drinks not made in stores, so we have
to make them ourselves.
We thought we'd assure the quality of our own personal
creations by testing them on our fellow coworkers.
Stud Michael Lewis enjoying a tasty gulp of Concoction__A.
Tester Kristen Ying thoughtfully delving into the delicious
Concoction__B.
Programmer Rob Stott ingurgitating a boatload of
Concoction__C.
RESULTS:
After thorough testing, Concoction__C was assured as the
company favorite. We call it The Mocha
Cherricchino.
Data.
Our 2,63130837 x 1035 th mixture, Concoction__XXX
The results of Tester Daniel Meretzky's heroic battle with
Concoction__XXX. ^
HMXQualityControl said...
Today started out like every
other work day, except for the fact that I awoke to the sounds of my
neighborhood being torn apart by zombies!! Realizing they were probably going
to wreck my car, I grabbed my trusty peacemaker (my Black Magic aluminum baseball
bat), my skateboard, and a bottle of vodka (it's flammable). My wife, Aileen,
insisted I stay inside, but I was already late for work. So with a kiss on the
cheek, I handed her my uncle's old AR-15 (smuggled back from the 'N
if she needed anything while I was out. Then I was out the door.
The trip to the car was
fairly uneventful, though I did get the perverse pleasure of giving my
obnoxious neighbor- turned-zombie the "T-Ball treatment" to the head as I
rolled by her in the hallway. Zombies are slow... and stupid.
There was no traffic on the
way in to work, and aside from the occasional zombie swarm, or burning school bus,
it was fairly quiet. As long as I kept a pace between 40 and 60 mph, I knew I'd
be fine. And I'd just filled the windshield fluid the other day, so zombie
blood was a non issue.
After parking in my
designated spot in the company lot, I plugged my headphones into my PSP (Shut
up!!! The PSP rules!!) and cranked up some classic White Zombie, as it seemed appropriate
background music for the potential carnage I was about to be mixed up in.
Faster than you can say "Wild Zero" I was skating up Prospect Street, smacking zombies silly and trying not
to slip on the blood of dead innocents as I made my way to the office
building's lobby. At one point I had to abandon the skateboard when some zombie
in a wheelchair tried to tackle me.
After I got to the lobby, I
jammed the side access door shut with the vacant guard chair. Central Square's
homeless community were holding their own outside, and no one seemed to notice
me as I snuck into the building.
The elevators were broken, so
I took the stairs. Apparently there were zombies in the building, as I passed
numerous bodies of dead (soon to be undead) office workers from the other
floors while making my ascent to the 5th floor.
When I got to the fifth
floor, I was out of breath, and paused for a minute. This floor seemed quiet,
and safe. That was, until I passed the bathroom door, which was covered in
blood and random zombie goop. With bat in hand, I entered the bathroom. As I
entered I saw a pile of dead zombies with no heads. The floor was covered in
blood and random body parts. As I walked around the corner, I froze. On the
floor, with his back to the wall, sat the remains of my dear friend and
co-worker, Bill, staring dead eyed at the mess he'd made of the zombies who'd
eventually killed him. He'd obviously put up a fight. It looked as though
they'd even come down on him from the ceiling panels. He didn't stand a chance.
By his side was a blood covered book and a lighter. I picked up both.
The book detailed how he'd made his way into the building, only to be attacked by a bunch of brain eaters.
He'd survived a two story fall in an elevator, and had managed to make his way
to the fifth floor, only to end up dying on the bathroom floor. He'd always
joked how he didn't want to go out like Elvis, dying in a bathroom, with no one
to help you. At least he wasn't on the toilet. He died fighting.
I shut the book, and tucked
it into my back pocket. Then I reached down and closed Bill's eyelids. "Rock on bro.." I said, and turned to leave the bathroom. As I opened the door, I
thought I heard something behind me. Then I felt a cold grip around my throat.
"Itchy... Tasty..." He said...
Bill's Journal:
HMXQualityControl said...
Skully Mc Skullhead:
Skullhead was manufactured with a sad and mildly perplexed
expression. Upon Google searching we came up with no further biographical
information, rendering Skullhead, "Mysterious". Transportation
methods include "random movement by Keith" and "ethereal
hovering".
Special attacks:
- Tri-Skull - Splits into three very small skulls. All of
them have a difficult time communicating with each other for attack. To perform
Tri-Skull, hold left or right for 2 seconds and press A, A, B, up.
- Power Power Size 9 - Size and speed increase. To perform
Power Power Size 9, steal controller from opponent and hold up on both
controllers for 5 seconds. Then give the controller back and don't look your
opponent in the eye.
Skulltholomew Von Evil:
Von Evil is totally angry. Upon Google searching we weren't
getting anywhere with knowledge of his shadowy past. Transportation methods
include "telephone calling teleport with some kind of death" and
"movement by canon".
Special attacks:
- Beta Flame EX - Catches on fire, screams and launches
towards you + violence EX+2. To Perform Beta Flame EX, hold B while pressing
down, A, down, A, down, A, down, down, A and let go of B.
- Mega Rad Lava - Gets so angry, he barfs lava. To perform
Mega Rad Lava, press a bunch of button, blame it on the controller and throw it
at a wall.
clear winner, we did some probing and detective work using a vast armada of
knowledge, soda and late night antics.
bounce better and farther than his rival. Tests show that the opposite is true.
Squishiness does not equal bounciness. I like how various (difficult to
accurately read) emotions have the potential to psyche out opponents. His teeth
are perfect but I can't see them well from a distance. where's the artists when
you need them? And could you clean up the seam?! So unprofessional. Skullhead
keeps telling my things I don't want to hear. Can I bug that?
Skulltholomew Von Evil: He's a bit of a lightweight. His
weight makes for difficult maneuvering. Past skull fractures create possible
problem impact areas. Dental problems abound! can we have the artists make some
gum? Unhinged anger makes for some good water cooler humor. Indeed.
QA Q&A:
Q: Thanks for taking the time to answer our questions and by
"our" I mean "the fans".
Tim: That wasn't a question.
Jeremy: Indeed.
Q: How did you arrange the fight between two skulls, Skully
Mc Skullhead and Skulltholomew Von Evil?
Tim: We took two skulls and threw them at each other. It was
rad.
Q: Did the skulls enjoy the fight to the death.
Skully Mc Skullhead: ....
Skulltholomew Von Evil: (chicken noise)
Q: So you're job consists of testing and assuring a level of
quality to games?
Jeremy: No we just play them and rant about how awesome they
are.
Q: They are awesome.
Tim: You didn't hear it from me but they are awesome.
Q: Now who won the skull fight? I'd love to know.
Skully Mc Skullhead: ....
Skulltholomew Von Evil: (chicken noise)
Tim: Wasn't it clear? A very small skull from the crater of
doom in the mystical mountains of Evil Thoughts.
Q: Wow, and how did the very small skull win?
Very Small Skull: Muwahaahhahahaaaaa!
Q: Thanks for taking time to answer questions.
Tim: That wasn't a question
Skulltholomew Von Evil: (chicken noise)
~From: Tim (Enosity) and Jeremy (Music-Is-Math)
HMXQualityControl said...
have six (There were more, but I gave them away to deserving
children/co-workers). But I'm not the only one. It's fair to say that through
out QA alone there is a small army of tiny plastic warriors and assorted bad
asses. And if we were to include all of Harmonix, we are talking about an
unstoppable legion of the world's greatest heroes and villains rendered in
eight to ten inch plastic models.
That said, in the QA pit there has always been a casual
debate as to who had the most bad ass action figure overall. Many figures
battled, many figures fell in a defeated lump of melted plastic. After the
smoke and toxic fumes cleared, only five remained standing-
Nina Williams (Tekken), Ichigo Kurasaki (Bleach), The
Werewolf (McFarlane Toys), Raziel (Soul Reaver), and Sid Vicious (Bass player
for legendary punk band, the Sex Pistols).
[/center]
High on the fumes from the burnt plastic of his fallen opponents
(and hung over from the night before), Sid Vicious attacked Ichigo without
warning, screaming something about how big swords don't mean $#!+ when it comes
to real bad asses. Then he threatened to take Ichigo's sword and turn him into
an anime popsicle with it.
[center]
[/center]
This sent the noble soul reaper into a rage, and
drawing his giant sized sword, he attacked Sid, who just stood there, sneering.
[center]
[/center]
Ichigo didn't stand a chance. Quicker than you can say Adult Swim Ichigo was sent packing, his orange hair just a little less spikey
and bright, and his warrior spirit replaced with shame for having even thought
of attacking the man who'd invented the Pogo dance craze of the late 70's.
Next up was Nina Williams, who was extremely angered at Sid
for unpleasant advances he'd made on her the previous evening.
[center]
[/center]
Though her Kung Fu was good, she dropped faster than the
ratings for Blade: the TV Series.
[center]
[/center]
Then there was a still, cool silence in the air. Raziel, the
Soul Reaver (which is actually way cooler than a soul reaper) appeared, as if
from thin air, with blood on his claws, fire in his eyes, and one word hissed
between his soul sucking vampire fangs. "Viciouss"
[center]
[/center]
Sid sized up the undead assassin, and spitting through his
patented sneer, barked out "Piss off, Wanker!"
[center]
[/center]
A resounding "SWEET!" echoed through the fifth floor as the
QA staff cheered on what was sure to be the battle of the night. Unfortunately,
I was far less enthusiastic, as both action figures were mine, and I didn't want to see either one lose and end up a pathetic puddle of smoking
polypropelene. Raziel would be wicked hard to replace, and Sid's just too cool
to go out getting his soul swallowed like so much warm Guinness.
So, against my better judgement, I stopped the fight before
the first blow could be struck. "This fight can't happen. You're both awesome,
and masters of your respective domains. And you're both kinda rare and hard to
replace, and I don't want to lose either of you!!"
This didn't go over well with the crowd that had gathered,
especially Bailey, who was complaining that his Ichigo action figure seemed
somewhat quiet and withdrawn now.
[center]
[/center]
Raziel shot me a dirty look, and with a coldly stated "...Lame..." walked back to his place on my desk.
This left only the Werewolf and Sid standing.
[center]
[/center]
"Whatchoo want, furbag?!" Sid sneered at the Werewolf, who
then stated quite humbly that all he wanted was Sid's autograph.
[center]
[/center]
Apparently
before becoming a lycanthrope model for McFarlane Toys, he'd been a bouncer at
and thought the world of Mr. Vicious. Sid politely obliged, and carved his
initials into the Werewolf's forehead with a rusty switchblade. The Werewolf
was overjoyed, and ran off singing "Holidays in the Sun", one of two Sex
Pistols songs Sid ever helped write.
So that's that. At the end of the day, Sid reigned supreme
as the most bad ass action figure in the QA department. But it was no surprise,
really. Everyone knows that Sid Vicious rules. Well, Lemmy from Motorhead
actually rules more, but I've never seen a Lemmy action figure, so SID RULES!!
[center]
[/center]
[center]
[/center]
"This isn't over, Viciousss..."
HMXQualityControl said...
Summary: Functionality " My tea ran out and there is no more to drink.
Description:
Repro-
1.Walk to 1369 Coffee House
2.Order an Oolong Tea and a Chocolate Chip cookie (to go)
3.Smile and be flirtatious with the Baristas
4.Return to work
5.Start Listening to the Dead Milkmen and review recently submitted bugs
Result-
Oolong tea disappears and there is no more to drink
Expect-
Magical fairies, or QA minions, should refill my tea with hot w Water.
Found In Version: 070523
Category: Metagame functionality
Severity: C
Summary: Functionality - Febreeze does not make my clothes clean
Description:
Repro-
1. Run out of clean socks (usually takes about 2 weeks)
2.Smell your dirty socks and find a pair that is still wearable
3.Wear them 2 more times
4.Febreeze them, along with the rest of your dirty laundry
Result-
Laundry is still actually dirty, but it smells a lot better.
Expect-
If Febreeze is going to make my laundry smell better, it should also clean it in the process.
Found In Version: 070523
Category: Metagame functionality
Severity: B
Summary: Old man is naked while applying deodorant
Description:
Repro-
1.Wake up at 7am
2.Walk 30 minutes to the gym
3.Lift weights for an hour
4.Return to the locker room and take a shower
5.After the shower, return to your locker (#23)
Result-
An old man is in front of your locker in the buff, staring at you and
applying deodorant. As you walk closer, his application process slows
down and his glare becomes more intense
Expect-
Old creepy naked men do not use deodorant. This is an unrealistic scenario.
Found In Version: 070523
Category: Character
Severity: A
HMXQualityControl said...
Today in QA land we are assuring the quality of
every body's favorite friend from the past.... My Pet
Monster.
Everybody loved this little blue horned demon as a
kid, but how does he stand up against the rigorous
testing of Harmonix QA? Also, is anyone else creeped out that Bailey's entire look is inspired by My Pet Monster?
We quickly discovered that My Pet Monster makes an
awful pillow. Being before noon, we immediately took
him into a quiet corner for a pre lunch nap.
Unfortunately his face is much harder than the rest of
him and it's hard to get comfortable without poking
your eye on his nose or fangs. The second problem with
using him as a sleeping aid is that this thing talks!
Accidentally squeeze or roll over onto his hand and
you are startled awake with a greeting of "I am your
monster friend!"
Not being able to catch any Z's, we moved on to more
inventive test cases. We introduced My Pet Monster to
Blossom of the Power Puff Girls.
In a jealous rage My Pet Monster almost instantly
tackled Blossom to fight for the title of preferred
toy. The results were devastating.
We tried to calm My Pet Monster down but he wouldn't
have it. Before we knew it he had challenged us to a
chain bound knife fight.
Luckily QA was victorious....
But the test had to be cut short as the beast was no
longer responding.
After dispatching of your furry foe we found a new use
for the shackles. They make a great management tool.
HMXQualityControl said...
There's a lot you can say
about Cap'n Crunch, most of which has been said already. He's a Captain; his
cereal is supposed to look like booty; eating it induces bleeding from every
part of the mouth except your tongue, and as was pointed out by Bailey yesterday,
"He's really REALLY old and practically blind." I suppose what hasn't
been said by the media-probably because they were distracted by Phil Spector's
hair and Paris Hilton's tears-is that there are now more types of Cap'n Crunch
than members of the holy trinity. This means the crusty goat can probably grant
wishes. He sure did for us when we discovered Choco Crunch.
As delicious as this is, and
our job being hungry work, we speculated that two hits of the Cap'n might be
better than one, and so yesterday morning, Keith, Grace, Bailey and Maria strode
into the Freq Pit armed only with two boxes of cereal-(one chocolate, one
original), some milk, and a sense of adventure. Since Bailey has a bitchin'
camera phone, he acted as documentarian.
Check out the the early dawn
light gleaming on those spoons!
In the bowl, the cereal
looks gorgeous. Like the cover of one of those food magazines. Gamers! Ready
your breakfast and eat hearty-for tonight, we dine in hell!
Grace wanted as many action
shots as possible. For this one we wanted to add laser effects, but ran out of
time.
At last, we tasted our
creation. And tasted. And tasted.
It was harder than we
expected to come up with a verdict.
Keith pointed out that the
Choco Crunch doesn't cut your mouth like the original. He speculated that the
cocoa powder acts as a softening agent on the usual shards of rock-like sugar
found in the original. He also noted that the presence of both black and white
cereal in his bowl stood for a metaphor for his ethnic background. Keith rocks.
Grace said it was very
sweet, then refused to drink the milk left in her bowl, asserting that it would
make her vomit. We told her she was a wimp who wouldn't put it on the line for
her company. She said she couldn't hear what we were saying because she was too
busy packing for another business trip to
Bailey refused to taste it.
It must have been his sense of journalistic integrity to not get personally
involved with a story. Or maybe he's lactose intolerant? Bailey's kind of a
mystery that we've all been trying to unravel.
I wondered if my eyeglass
frames tasted better than the cereal. I'm still trying to decide on that.
Ultimately, Keith said it
best. Separately, the original Crunch is The Standard And Classic, like Clark
Gable in a bowl of milk if he weren't dead and buried. Grace, like the goddess
of truth that she is, pointed out that the Choco Crunch was clearly superior,
and Keith mentioned it tasted like the delicious original Count Chocula of
decades past. I concur, but as it's a newcomer to the Quaker Mills shelf, I
think that Choco Crunch still needs to prove it's not " for a limited time only " before it eternally wins our hearts. And the two of them together? A pleasant
interlude, a distraction if you will, that doesn't live up to the power of the
original. This was one time when the whole was less than the sum of its parts.
[Epilogue-it should be noted
that according to the box, Choco Crunch is a "Smart Choice Made
Easy", with a little green stamp of approval that tells you how healthy it
is. The original Crunch has no such commendation. Also, we all felt vaguely
weird, amped, and a little sick for the rest of the rest of the morning. It
might have been because we ignored this warning:
[That'll teach us.]
Yay! Enjoy the site, everyone!
Thursday, December 20, 2007